Updated: Sep 1
Everyone faces fear and self-doubt over the course of their lives. They are also two of the biggest obstacles to success and happiness. The good news is that there are many things you can do, that are within your control, to rise above these emotions.
Take these steps to overcome your fear and self-doubt
1. Identify what you’re actually afraid of.
What do you really fear? Dig deep. The most common fears for most of us come down to failure and making a fool out of one’s self.
If you want to start a business, but can’t seem to get started, what is your real concern? Maybe you want to ask for a raise or a promotion. What is the real fear? Your boss is not going to hit you over the head with a rock.
Once you become aware of your actual fear, you’ll have a chance of addressing it.
2. Find situations related to your fear that are only mildly uncomfortable.
Perhaps you have a fear of public speaking. What could you do that’s similar, but less terrifying? You could:
Give a speech to a group of friends
Start conversations with strangers
Visualize yourself giving a speech
Do more group activities and speak up more
If you’re afraid of heights, you could start by looking down over a 2nd floor balcony and slowly work your way up to greater heights. 3. Take action.
Thinking creates and magnifies fear. Taking action lessens fear. One of the best ways to get over fear is to immediately take action before you have a chance to talk yourself out of it.
Most people would be more successful, happier, and less afraid if they thought less and did more. 4. Visualize yourself being unafraid.
Imagine you have a twin that’s similar to you, but also different. If you could build the perfect twin, what would they be like? What skills, beliefs, and attitudes would they have? How would they handle the situation that creates fear in you? Allow yourself to become that twin. 5. Give yourself small successes.
Set yourself up to win. Make the game so easy that you can’t fail. As you gain confidence, up the stakes a little. Get used to being successful in the situations that cause you to feel fear.
If the thought of making 100 cold calls a day makes you break out in a cold sweat, give yourself the goal of making just one cold call. The next day, you can do three. Show yourself that you can do it. Show yourself that nothing bad is going to happen to you. 6. Be realistic.
What is the worst consequence you are likely to endure if the thing you fear comes true? It’s probably not anything you can’t handle! What happens if the publisher rejects your book? What if your speech doesn’t go well? What’s actually going to happen to you? Will you still be safe? Will your family still love you? 7. Get help.
Whether from a friend or a professional, there’s no shame in getting help. There are coaches that specialize in just about every area in which you might need support and encouragement: writing, speaking, sales, confidence – to name a few. Help is out there.
How much do you allow fear and self-doubt to rule your life and stop you from achieving the success you desire? Imagine what your life would be like if you could overcome all of your fears and self-doubt.
Most people avoid the actions that trigger these uncomfortable feelings. You can do better. You can act in the face of these emotions, fulfill your potential and live your life to the fullest.